What if you do everything "right"...you've filled your well-being cup, you've had honest conversations, you've readied yourself for the next steps, you've taken inspired action and you still feel frustrated, angry, depressed, anxious?
At first, you may feel like shouting, "What The F"?!
Upon further examination though, you may realize that you are attaching your emotional state to outcomes and circumstances. The problem is these outcomes and circumstances likely involve other people, which inherently places them in the "can't control" zone.
Usually, when we try to control or even just find ourselves inside of someone else's story we are left feeling powerless and this toxicity lies in the relationships and communication realm.
Here are 10 questions you can ask yourself that may help if you find yourself here.
1. Generally, does this relationship enhance my life?
2. What outcome am I seeking?
3. Am I being honest with myself about what outcome I am seeking?
4. Am I communicating honestly and clearly and listening deeply?
5. If I have made a few attempts at honest communication and it has not been either well-delivered or well-received, what have I learned and how would I like to go forward?
6. What are the signs that I need to stop attempting communication?
7. What are the signs that I need to distance myself from this relationship or person?
8. When will I know if it's wise to revisit the relationship if ever?
9. How will I know if I have truly detached from the toxic aspects of the relationship?
10. How can I redirect my focus and attention?
Hope this helps if you are dealing with a messy, "What The F?" kind of situation.